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Conflicts in couple

Practically in any couple the conflicts are inevitable, and this not so pathological phenomenon, but regulation.

        At the beginning of the relations love euphoria and idealization of the partner are often characteristic. Over time there comes the period of quarrels and nedoponimaniye. Partners begin to see each other real, with shortcomings, features and so forth. If partners steroids for sale uk are not able to talk with each other and to hear each other, then they often constrain the discontent or ineptly express it (accuse of all the partner though in the relations responsibility always shares for two). They take a position that the partner should guess their desires and requirements (all responsibility for own wellbeing shifting to the partner). Are not able to realize what is wanted, and are not able to ask about it. They begin to understand what is not wanted when already everything occurred instead of thinking of it in advance.

       Sometimes partners are afraid to clash, but then they also do not show the real face, they not the presents in the relations. And inside at them tension increases and then or there is an explosion, or they turn into grumblers buy steroids online uk who are dissatisfied with everything.

       In such cases if partners cannot resolve an issue, it is possible to address the family psychologist who will help to see a situation from outside and more objectively, will show possible ways of the conflict resolution and resources in it.

        In the conflict partners show the negative feelings. If another is capable to accept them and not to turn away, then their union proceeds. Generally are afraid of it that the partner will leave or the relations will deteriorate if I show it that something irritates me, angers or enrages.
        The conflict finds out that it does not suit one or both partners, their requirement. It is important to hear needs of each other, to recognize them important. And further to decide whether it is possible to satisfy them.
It is curious that after the conflict resolution partners steroids uk become closer to each other. They already know what from each other to wait for. Plus different feelings give rise to bigger interest in the partner, it becomes more convex, stops being positive-flat.
Many psychologists will tell that you should not be afraid of the conflicts, it is only necessary to use them efficiently. Try to understand each other, explain the position and hear the spouse, recognize important and the, and his requirements, reach compromise.

 

Examples of the conflicts:

  • - compulsion of one of spouses by another, pressure by the authority, man's force, female obstinacy or even craftiness,
  • - confrontation, spouses act according to the discretion, without paying attention to the partner, often even without talking with each other — in both cases there is a fight between spouses – who stronger, it is not enough respect and recognition of value of each of them — a deadlock way;
  • - leaving from a problem, spouses, on acquiescence, till a time do not touch upon a sore subject, however if they understand that it is temporary, consider behavior of the partner and own and, eventually, decide to talk with each other, can come to the reasonable decision arranging both if partners continue to suppress not resolved question, tension gradually increases more and more, preventing from to communicate normally with each other and to feel comfort and tranquility in their relations;
  • - conflict smoothing, sometimes quite suitable way if only it comes to an end with a mutual and final consent, but not oppression of one of partners. If partners or one of partners try to smooth the conflicts all the time, then they do not prove to be the presents, the true feelings (irritations, offenses, rage, etc.); - a compromise, quite acceptable way where during discussion of the spouse come to the decision, admissible for both, and mutual conciliation.


        On consultation of the psychologist partners can understand that periodically in the relations aggression is necessary since it bears with itself a big charge of energy. Aggression is not always destructive, it m. constructive, and often such also happens. Important it are not afraid and to be able to manage with it.
There is a rage "go to me" and rage "leave me". They have different vectors and are urged to serve a miscellaneous. The first type of aggression is directed to desire to get closer to the partner, the second – to desire to move away from it and to protect the personal borders. Therefore it is necessary to distinguish that happens to you at the time of quarrel where your aggression is directed.

Outputs:

- it is important to dare to have any feelings,

- learn to express them,

- and to learn to ask about what you want.



What will help to deal with the conflict, first of all, to you:

- try to understand an actual reason of the conflict, and not just an occasion to it;

- analyze the role the first minutes of emergence and further development of the conflict;

- share responsibility for the conflict and take to yourself the part of charge of, and mentally give to the partner it,

- distract, think about volume good what was and is between you, can you should not lose it?

       Undoubtedly, there are also situations when no reflections and arrangements of help. Then it is worth reflecting and what you are held by the friend near the friend? And whether it is worth saving the relations doing harm